When I was studying to become an aircraft engineer, my favorite class was vibrations. In it, we learned that different materials vibrate at different frequencies and you had to make sure that whatever you were using could take the stress it would be under. I’ve often thought of emotions as vibrations. Different emotions operate at different frequencies. I think of it like an FM radio. One station plays oldies, another classical. I have to tune in to the frequency, or station, to hear what I want.
I’ve always been pretty empathic. I feel other’s emotions strongly. When I was a teenager, my friends would have some kind of drama and I would feel it as strongly as if it was my own. Often, my friends would get over whatever was going on and I would still be suffering. Becoming a mom has only enhanced this skill/curse. My kids will tell you that I need them to tell me when I can stop worrying. They need to let me know when a situation is no longer bothering them, so I can let go of it.
I’ve been learning lately, that I might not be able to control what’s playing on the radio, but I can learn how to change the station. In the news, with our friends, in life in general, we are bombarded with all sorts of emotions/frequencies. I can overwhelm myself with the negative, the sad stories, the anger. I can also choose to change the station. I can tune into the happy stories, the acts of kindness, human connections. Both stories are out there. It’s like that old Native American tale of the two wolves. Which wolf wins? The one you feed.