From Lisa: There are not many good things I can say about secrets. People often believe that by keeping secrets they protect others or themselves from harm, but truthfully most secrets only destroy. Secrecy destroys people, friendships, relationships, and mental health, because secrets destroy trust. Some secrets are kept because we believe it will protect us or others. Some secrets are kept because we don’t want to face certain truths about ourselves or we are ashamed of something we have done or has been done to us. The shame and fear hold the secrets tight in our souls. They paralyze us and sentence us to an unfulfilled life, where we never find peace, contentment or love.
Secrecy keeps things stuffed deep down and keeps us in denial. It doesn’t allow us to work through the tough issues that will eventually bring us peace. It actually allows our minds to embellish or exaggerate the issues until they become unmanageable, unsurmountable. The only way we can gain freedom from dark secrets is by being honest and transparent with ourselves and the people we love. Step-by-step gaining trust in ourselves, our environment, our friends and family and ultimately in our world. It may seem impossible and unbelievably scary, but once we get in the habit of releasing our secrets, we will find peace more often and more quickly. By giving up our secrets we allow others into our lives to walk with us through our struggles. By giving up secrecy we keep relationships in a healthier place and relieve the burden of constantly working to make sure no one learns our secret.
Take the chance. Start with something small. Let someone in on a tiny secret, something not so scary. Breathe in their acceptance and acknowledge the relief you feel as that one tiny secret is let go. Now try another. Soon you will begin to feel lighter. Your life will fill with greater hope and excitement of the future. You will regain energy you were wasting on keeping those pesky secrets. You will learn more and more about yourself and start to gain trust in the goodness of life. You will become stronger and happier and you will pass it on to others. Go be courageous! Let go of a secret today.